Who are Heroes?

Here is my first story.  It was written in late 2009 after my oldest sister, Diane Panzico Coleman suffered a severe illness and was hospitalized.  Where she has struggled with health issues all of her life, this particular set back led the entire family to believe she would not survive the night.  It was not until I started a collection of short stories in 2011 that I actually included this story with the others.  Lets just see how it flows.  Hope you enjoy it. 

          Who are Heroes?  Every one of us could probably answer that in so many ways. A soldier decorated for his accomplishments on the battlefield or one of thousands that place themselves at the call and direction of their government? The saying in the country song "all gave some, some gave all?"    Ever looked past that to see just what it is those "heroes" were laying their life on the line for?   If I might, let me try and give you a snapshot of just one of those reasons... 

          Her name is Diane.  At the time of this writing in 2009, she was nine years my senior at just 67.  She was the first born girl child of Willie Ruel and Yvonne Stewart Ferguson actually.  After their death in 1996 and 97 respectively, she slowly but deliberately earned the title of "matriarch" of that remaining family pod.  Matriarch?  Now, there is a title that could be debated to various depths from others far and wide, but as for me, let’s just say "she was the oldest and the one we loved the longest," and that title was hers alone to define.   I am talking about myself and my other two sisters, Sandra and Nona Lee.  And she earned that title because it just isn't given out.  It is like I said, earned!  Here is just a touch of why!  

          Her first real baby you might say was me.  Along with my sister Sandra, two years behind her and a mother from Amite County Mississippi, I can tell you without argument that my early childhood was an exercise of the feminine gender's ability to mold and influence that of the male species.  That estrogen ocean didn't work  to well with Dad, I'm sure, but I was "impressionable!"   As a result and without shame today, I can admit that even at 63, I  still sit down when I pee!  Those early lessons, I don't think there was any permanent damage, but for some reason, I don't like to be sitting on the toilet when it is flushed to this very day.  Hmmm...  But regardless the foundation was cast and my wife Linda,  the long term beneficiary.  

          Diane was the first to graduate from college. I wanted to also, and because of her, I sat my mind to do just that.  She retired from teaching school after some 30 years.  She raised three beautiful daughters and I’m talking about complete beauty here, from the inside as well as out!  Do I need to tell you how she is with babies?  Even had fingerprints all over my first born when I found myself raising him alone when he was just 16 months old?  Hmmm...  I wonder if he sits down to... well, never mind.  I've never bother to ask?  Oh well...  And she did all of this while enduring open heart surgery not once, not twice, but three times in her adult life.  Her child bearing years!  Talk about a flair for the dramatic!  But that was then and still is our Diane...  Never complained, only talked about her inconveniences when asked.  

          Diane openly entertained any and all that came to her home.  You were always welcomed there.  Son-in-laws came and stayed!  If they were founded in "family" before they married into hers, they sure didn't want to leave when they got there.  Then the grandbabies started coming.  Oh goodness her grandbabies... Her life was and still is as we speak her grandbabies.  Even when she couldn't physically, she still embraced them.  They were loved...  Actually, anyone that ever became remotely associated with this woman, Diane, was loved...  Just how much you received was up to you!  She told me once when I was struggling to be "politically correct" because I had gone to college and was "educated" not to miss out on the blessings of life.  Let me explain...  Again, back to my first born... Was told by many in the "system" that he needs to sleep in his own bed!  This was text book!  Will help these children become independent and strong.  And of course me denying my roots and totally ignorant of where I came from, was finally able to understand her simple words.  "Brother, you need to hold that baby and love him.  Hold him close because there is going to come a time when you can't!"  Oh what words of wisdom... And how true they eventually became!  I have not been denied that blessing.  And let me tell you this.  Neither have any of my grandbabies that my children allowed to be a part of my life. Truly a blessing.  

          So you see, it is for people like her that "recognized" heroes go off to fight wars.  To protect the institution of the family from which they came.  To preserve the family unit, the only hope we have left as the church became more politically correct and the unionized school system become less effective as a role model for our children.  So as I wrestle with this "Hero thing," let me apply the "all gave some, some gave all" application to this very person I can define as my Hero. 

          We exist for a short period of time between two eternities.  We are introduced to this short period of time through a process called birth and we leave it through a process called death.  The period in between birth and death is what we refer to and define as life.  From the first breath we take, we began to accelerate through seconds, minutes, hours, days, weeks, months and years to an exit ramp defined as death.  Sometimes there are clear indications of these exit signs and sometimes they take us by surprise, but they are there.  These signs are now visible in Diane’s journey.  PET Scans have shown something wrong in both lungs and a tumor on her larynx that is affecting her speech and breathing.  Because of her heart condition, doctors have to adjust her medicine just to be able to perform a biopsy to confirm what we "think" might be a clear exit sign.  IN THE MEAN TIME...  The second week of May she went to a bowling tournament in Reno, Nevada and on the 16th, her beautiful granddaughter, Shelby, was getting married in her back yard!  Now... regardless of what that exit sign says, I can hear her GPS saying "recalculating" as she sped right by that exit because she still had things to do!    

          You know, I like my definition of Hero.  Regardless of what mountain that life places before her, she always finds a way to discover the beauty it holds in its present state of existence.  So as we look at giving some and giving all?  Diane is still giving all that she has to those that she loves.   And for five years after I wrote this, guess who's GPS has still Recalculated with every trip to the hospital?   A little more that 12 hours into the 28th day of January, 2014 my sister did take that exit ramp.   Knowing her, she was probably a touch on the perturbed side because she was a few minutes late with having lunch with Jesus.  I was unable to be at her bedside because I had just come home from the hospital the day before from a possible stroke that left the left side off my face paralyzed, compounded by the Ice and snow between Pineville, La and Monroe. So as I sit here completing this final entry about one of my favorite heroes, I want to share just a couple of things.  She set the bar high for her family.  One they should seek to emulate from example alone and nothing more.  And her girls, Cindy, Lori and Lee Ann will do just that because of their mother's powerful influence in their lives.  I have observed over the years, that what makes them complete were three men I have grown to respect and admire.  They are Mark, Bimbo and Troy... Once they became part of her family, they stayed.  As for me?  I know the first thing she asked of Jesus when she sat down beside him, "Please kiss my brothers face and make it well."  And with that, there is no need for her GPS to recalculate as she is where No One can ever take her away from us again. 

I love you Sister.

 

Rod Ferguson

Written in Late 2009

Posted March 23, 2011
Updated January 29, 2014